All morning, I felt like something was off.
Like being on the edge of a raging river that you know if you try to cross will suck you to the bottom and drag you crashing into rocks all the way to the ocean.
And then right before I walk out the door for work, my wife drops a bowl of food she was preparing in the kitchen and cries out in frustration and surprise.
Now, I have autism, and in that moment … because of the way I’d been feeling all day, I felt overstimulated and pushed over the edge into that raging river.
Yeah, I admit that I kicked the dog’s water bowl (they were nowhere around) in that frustration.
And on that final note, I headed out the door to work.
Keep in mind, I work direct care one of the units at a local mental hospital.
When I walked onto the unit, I found it mirrored the chaos I’d already been experiencing.
Meaning … This was more than just a spilled, broken food bowl and my follow-up overstimulation.
Was not easy walking into what felt like chaos, but in the end … I’d find little things I could do that would help those around me with a goal of helping calm the raging sea of emotion and activity buzzing around.
Example … When the person serving dinner was called downstairs to another unit to help with a patient transfer and was running late getting back, I disappeared into the prep room and prepped the dinner service so that when they walked in expecting to be way, way behind … everything was read and the atmosphere in that room calm.
I could have done nothing, but it would have continued the hectic feelings of the patients as their dinner would have been late.
It would have continued those same feelings with the staff as the patients would have been more frustrated with that coloring things … or themselves have been deep in the weeds with regards to their duties.
Just the small things were enough to make a difference, and we can point to the fact that the atmosphere from dinner forward was a LOT calmer on our unit than it had been previously.
Calm and more relaxed with relaxed being not just a better work environment but much more healing for the patients residing with us in that moment.
Small deeds can make a huge difference.
And I did my best to string out several of those small moments of action to help calm those waters.
~ The Pathfinder
